It's never too late, but you do need to readjust your priorities.

It's true, it's never too late to be what you want to be. However, if you have children, significant others, any people who depend on you, your options for doing what you want to do, dwindle.

That much is obvious, no?

I admit I thought I wouldn't be as affected by the stress of an ongoing pandemic, family deaths, the political climates, the rising inflation and lack of money and my kids daily drama. I thought I would always find the energy to create comics. I love making comics.

With all those things and as my children grow older, their problems change. Their friends come and go, bullies make problems and the piles of schoolwork and hormonal changes all add up to a lot of emotional discussions. And I don't want to draw after these emotional discussions. I feel mentally tired, and sad for my kids. I wish there was some ways to avoid certain childhood experiences. Being a kid is hard work. I empathise with them. My own childhood fucking sucked. I don't want to draw after I've heard the news, after reading about rights taken away and being unable to do much at all about any of this.

I became aware that as I was unable to produce art more and more frequently. I kept missing deadlines and got more frustrated with mysef. Pursuing professional comics was no longer doable for me, anymore. Maintaining a constant daily social media presence is impossible for me. To each their own. I need to be there for my kids, they come first before any art I do.

And so, I readjusted my sails. I started making zines. It's a way for me to flex my comic abilities, but on my own time and with no huge deadlines adding to my stressload. Joining other people's zines, participating in local art fairs, all give me a sense of community and a place to grow and feel like an artist.

I don't seek world domination anymore lol. I used to want to be famous. Now I just want a steady paycheck and to be painting for a living. For the moment I have a steady set of commissions to help with my bills for the next few months. Ideally I pick up some more commissions in the fall and get into a gallery as well.

Back to the point I was getting at. Your art life is not over if you cannot pursue a specific route. Just readjust your sails a bit, to accomodate whatever it is you're dealing with. People with chronic health issues, can't hold a paintbrush for long. What about painting for as long as you can?. Five minutes every day gives you a painting by the end of the week. Slow and steady, persevering through it all.

I like my side profile here. I was actually pretty annoyed at this point in the day, but the sun on my face masks the annoyance I guess.